Falling Through Darkness Read online

  “Shit, we slept all afternoon.”

  “Yeah,” I croak, my voice raspy from sleep. “I guess we needed it. It was nice though.”

  Turning back to me, he smiles at me like he knows what I can’t say out loud: that sleeping while being held in his arms was the most comfortable and restful sleep I have gotten in months—no, years—and it’s all because of him, his heat, and the feeling of security he blankets me in.

  “How are you feeling?”

  I smile at him. “Excellent. The nap helped, I’m just about back to normal.” I’m about to ask him if he wants to stay for dinner when he kisses me. I’m momentarily stunned before I melt into him. He unhurriedly explores my mouth in a lazy kiss. His hand gently slides down my side before he moves it to my ass and draws me toward him until I’m pressed up against his hardness. I moan as soon as I feel his erection press against me.

  Suddenly, the kiss goes from gentle and slow to passionate and demanding. His tongue engages mine in a frantic dance, demanding I follow him into the abyss of passion that exists between us and threatens to burn us both alive.

  Rolling me onto my back, I spread my legs and he falls in between them, pressing his erection just where I need him. The pressure against my drenched pussy through my flimsy sweatpants creates a friction that has me arch my back and a deep, pleasured whimper escapes my throat.

  “Fuck,” Duncan groans, still rubbing his hard length against me. One of his hands leaves my waist to move my shirt slowly up my body and over my bra-clad breasts. His gentle caress causes my skin to break out in goose bumps. All the while, his mouth moves across my jaw toward my ear, eliciting another shiver.

  “You’re so fucking sexy.” His voice is deeper than normal, his arousal clearly audible. “I can’t wait to fuck you. Slide into your tight, hot pussy and pound you into the mattress. Showing you how much you turn me on by just breathing.” Slowly, his fingers push the cup of my bra down, exposing my breast, before his thumb softly swipes across my hard nipple.

  Another deep moan escapes my throat and my hips involuntarily press up against him, causing the friction to deepen. I can’t believe how close to coming I am already.

  “Please…” I whisper, unable to raise my voice.

  “Please what, gorgeous?” he purrs, turning me on even more.

  I’ve never felt this much passion for someone. Usually it takes me quite a bit of foreplay to get to this stage, to be this wet and so turned on I lose all inhibitions. And just with a few kisses and swipe of his fingers, I’ve lost all control and am ready to combust at any second.

  “Please, make me come,” I beg. “I need to come…” If I was any less turned on, I’d be appalled at my begging, but I don’t care right now. I need him, his dick or his fingers; I don’t care at this point. I need him to finish what he started. I can feel the orgasm building; I just need more to find it.

  “My pleasure.” With that, his hand leaves my breast after one last pinch and moves down my curves. His skin is calloused which causes a delicious shiver to run through my body. I concentrate on his hand caressing my stomach as he licks my collarbone, moving across my chest. Suddenly, he sucks my exposed nipple into his hot mouth while his fingers slip into my panties, finding my pussy drenched. I cry out and grip his hair to hold him against me. My back arches, pushing my breast deeper into his mouth. His finger circles my clit, stirring the lust inside of me, before he slowly slides two fingers inside me.

  His mouth is still tormenting my breasts, alternating between them, while his fingers continue to move in and out of me, gradually becoming faster and more forceful. My hips move in accordance with his movement, building my orgasm until I don’t think I can take anymore. Suddenly, with a not-so-gentle bite of my nipple and a scissor motion of his fingers, he throws me over the edge.

  Wave after wave of pleasure courses through my body. My thighs press against him and my pussy walls contract over and over, trying to keep his fingers locked inside. I’ve never experienced this kind of pleasure before. Sure, I’ve had orgasms during sex, but never this intense and powerful. My whole focus narrows down to the most essential part of me, feeling every nerve ending in my body become electrified.

  Closing my eyes as the intensity overwhelms me, I can’t help the sounds coming from me. All I feel are his fingers and mouth prolonging the sensation wrecking my body.

  Once I come down from one of the most powerful orgasms I’ve ever experienced, my limbs flop exhausted to my sides. I no longer have control over them.

  “Oh, God…”

  My eyes are still closed, savoring the aftermath, when I feel Duncan withdrawing his fingers, causing ripples of pleasure to flow through my body. I shiver and open my eyes just in time to see him sucking his fingers into his mouth. He moans like he just tasted the most delicious thing ever, and when he looks at me, none of the heat and lust I’ve seen before is gone, if anything, it’s even more pronounced.

  “You taste delicious.”

  I grab his shirt and am about to pull him down for a kiss to continue with what we started when my doorbell rings.

  “Ignore it,” I whisper before I lick his lips, trying to entice him to forget about whoever is at the door. Smiling wickedly, he moves to deepen the kiss when the doorbell rings again, but this time it keeps going as if someone is holding down the ringer.

  “Motherfucker,” Duncan hisses and drops his face onto my chest in defeat. “We better go check who it is. I doubt they’ll stop.”

  “Fine.” I pout. “If we have to.”

  “You’re cute,” he says, giving me a tender smile while his eyes show me just how much he hates stopping.

  He moves my bra and shirt back in place before he moves off me. Standing next to the bed, he adjusts his erection with a grimace.

  “See, if we’d ignore the door I could take care of that little problem of yours.”

  “Little? Babe, there is nothing little about me,” he boasts in all seriousness before he grabs me by the ankle and pulls me to the edge of the bed and my feet touch the floor, causing me to squeal in surprise. Holding out his hand, he waits for me to take it. “C’mon. The person at the door isn’t leaving any time soon.”

  “Fine,” I grumble annoyed. I can’t believe this is happening. Ever since what happened in the kitchen earlier today, I’ve been thinking about what it would be like to have sex with Duncan—fantasizing really. And just when I was about to find out the universe interferes. It’s like it doesn’t want me to get laid or something. Okay, that’s a little overdramatic, but right now I’m too turned on to care.

  Tugging me off the bed, he continues to pull me into his arms. Even though the bell keeps ringing, as I stare into his eyes, all sound around me fades. His eyes are a deep blue, like the ocean in the summer, and the look he gives me is captivating; the combination steals my breath. It’s a mixture of tenderness, amusement, and heat that lets me know just what he’d be doing to me right now if we hadn’t been interrupted. He smiles at what I’m sure is an annoyed scowl on my face and lightly kisses me on the forehead. “To be continued.”

  Chuckling, I push him away from me before I jump him and say fuck it to whoever is at the door. I move around him toward the entrance, leaving him to take care of his little problem by himself.

  “Motherfucker, I’m coming! Jesus Christ.” Whoever is at the door better have a good reason to bother us. I move to the high-tech security system this place has which allows me to see who’s at the main entrance on a little screen next to the door. All I have to do is hit the yellow button next to the screen for it to turn on and show me who’s waiting outside. Then I hit the green button when I want to buzz them in. There is also a button so I can speak with the person, or a panic button, which is connected to the emergency line somehow and will alert the police. I still don’t know why Brendan would have such a fancy security system, but I don’t care. Having it makes me feel safer and more in control of my surroundings.

  When I turn on the security screen,
I see both Brendan and Emma standing there, holding up takeout while making funny faces at the screen.

  “Who is it?” Duncan asks from the hallway.

  “Your brother and Emma. Why are they here, together?” I wonder out loud. Did I miss something happening between them last night?

  “Not sure.” At my look, he continues, “Nothing happened last night as far as I know. I was a little preoccupied with you though. And Brendan didn’t say anything when I texted him earlier.”

  Rolling my eyes at him, I turn back toward the security system and press the button to activate the speaker. “What’s in the bag?”

  “It’s about time, Alex. What were you two doing that took forever to answer the door?” Emma demands. She’s cute when she’s all fired up and annoyed; I guess patience isn’t a virtue of hers either. And by the look Brendan shoots her, he seems to agree with me.

  “Ah, we were sleeping,” I hedge. No need to tell the whole world what we were up to not five minutes ago.

  Laughing, Brendan enters the conversation. “Is that what the kids call it these days?” Hearing this, Duncan starts laughing behind me. “Shut it, the both of you.” I glare in Duncan’s direction, which only makes him laugh harder.

  He wraps one arm around my stomach while he reaches around me with the other to buzz them in. “You’re only getting in because you brought food.” Kissing my neck, he pulls me away from the door to unlock it.

  Surprisingly, knowing the door isn’t locked doesn’t bother me right now. While it’s a thought in my mind, it’s fleeting—an afterthought. That’s when it hits me and melts my insides and sets butterflies loose in my stomach, as well as terrifies me to the core—I feel safe with Duncan. Secure in the knowledge that he won’t let anything happen to me. In one week, seven days, he’s been able to push years of accumulated experiences and tragedies aside.

  I turn in his arms and stare at his beautiful face. The sharp angles and piercing eyes. I smile at him, hopefully showing him how happy I am he’s here. He’ll not understand what his presence means to me to its fullest, but I hope he understands I appreciate him being here.

  “They better have wine with them,” I complain just when there’s a knock at the door. Duncan reaches around me to open the door.

  Emma teases me with, “We have wine!” as soon as they’re through the door. “I know how to bribe you, my friend. You’re pretty easy.”

  Rolling my eyes at Duncan, I look at her and ask in my most serious tone. “Depends what kind you brought.”

  She smiles while looking at Duncan and me. She reaches into her bag and pulls out a bottle of wine and pretty much shoves it into my face. Rearing back, I chuckle at her exuberance. Someone’s in a good mood. I grab the bottle while I run a scrutinizing eye over her. There seems to be a glow around her, like for the first time in a long time she’s truly happy.

  Hmm, I wonder what that is all about.

  Brendan steps closer to Emma, trying to be inconspicuous and failing. I flit my gaze between the two. Did they hook up last night? Once again, I kick myself in the ass for getting drunk enough to not remember. I need to have a chat with her at some point. And from the look she shoots me, she feels the same need for a conversation soon.

  “Emma tells me it’s your favorite. And that it will prevent you from throwing us out of my own apartment,” Brendan jokes.

  Smiling, I look at the Riesling in my hands. “Well, she’s got me there. I can never say no to a good bottle of wine and takeout. But I can still throw you out, it’s my place now.” I smile at him. I like Brendan, even though I had my reservations when I first moved into his apartment. But he seems to be genuine and pretty straightforward, just like his brother.

  Duncan throws his arm around my shoulders and pulls me into his side while he laughs at our banter. And it’s nice, standing here with him, his brother, and my friend, joking back and forth without anyone having a hidden agenda. Maybe I’m being naïve, after everything, to trust people, but in this moment, I don’t care. I’m so sick of being lonely and if they prove me wrong and show me my trust was wrongly placed in them, I’ll just have to pick up the pieces and go on, like always. Though I have a feeling if it happens this time, I’ll lose more than just people I care about, I’ll lose the last part of myself that feels a spark of hope for something good coming into my life.

  I lean into Duncan’s body, letting myself relax against him, not caring what it says about the turn our relationship has taken. Duncan’s arm tightens around me at my movement.

  “Let’s open this bottle and eat before the food gets cold,” he mutters from above me before pressing a quick kiss to the top of my head. Granted, me standing here with his arm around me is pretty telling, and yet, I’m still shocked he’d go so far as to kiss me in front of his brother and Emma, our coworker. I wasn’t expecting this—for him to be this open about what is going on between us. I don’t mind it, but it’s nice to know he doesn’t either. Looking at Emma and Brendan confirms they know exactly what we’ve been up to if their identical smirks are anything to go by.

  Duncan lets go of me to grab the wine and move toward the kitchen with Brendan right behind him. Moving my gaze from Duncan’s ass to Emma, I notice her staring at Brendan’s. I burst out laughing. “We’re a pair, huh?” I ask through my laughter.

  Emma looks at me and her cheeks color before she smiles at me. “Yeah. Though, their asses are definitely worth staring at. I mean half the female population at work, students and teachers alike, is half in love with Duncan. Can you imagine what would happen if they got a good look at Brendan? Especially in his uniform.”

  “When did you see him in his uniform?”

  “I haven’t, but I’ve got a great imagination.” Her blush deepens and she chuckles softly.

  Smirking, I link my arm through hers before I pull her toward the kitchen. “Guess we both got lucky then.” I wink at her suggestively, causing her chuckle to intensify.

  The rest of the night is spent eating the takeout they brought and drinking the wine while chatting and getting to know one another. I can’t believe it’s only been a week since I moved across an ocean, ran into a stranger at a party who made me feel a lot more than I wanted, and started a new job only to run into said stranger again. A week since I left everything I know behind to start over in a new country. And for the first time in months, I’m hopeful that maybe I really can start over, draw a line between my past and present and move on; be happy and not scared every day of the week.

  Chapter Thirteen

  It’s nine o’clock in the morning when I wake up to the sound of birds chirping outside my window and the sun streaming through the curtains the next day. I’m happy. For the first time in months, I don’t wake up drenched in sweat due to a nightmare, or hot and bothered, but I do so with a smile on my face.

  Yesterday with Duncan had been amazing. Granted, I could have done without the hangover or the humiliation of puking in front of him, but we actually had fun together. There has been no pressure whatsoever to be a certain way, like I’ve experienced many times before on dates. I could be myself—messy bun and old, baggy sweatpants included.

  I’m not suddenly fearless when it comes to Duncan and what he makes me feel, I’m still terrified. These emotions he brings forth in me are uncharted territory. The fact that he was able to put a crack in my walls within a week—a wall I’ve been building for months, if not years—only makes it worse. But it also gives me comfort in a strange way. If all he wanted from me were a quick fuck, he wouldn’t go through all this trouble. Putting up with my shit from last week can’t be worth that. Not when you look like him and have women all over town begging for your dick. I might have only lived here for a week, but even I’ve heard all the gossip around the community. And the mothers and fellow teachers do not hide their appreciation for his body. Not that I can fault them for it. He is one fine specimen.

  With a heavy sigh, I shove thoughts of what he’s hiding underneath his tight clothes aside
, not that they leave much to the imagination, throw off the covers and move to the bathroom.

  Duncan informed me last night he’s taking me on a proper date today and to be ready after lunch. He didn’t ask, mind you, he told me while he had me pressed up against my front door and kissed me breathless. I was barely able to form a coherent sentence, let alone protest the fact that he ordered me to do something. All I could do was nod while trying to shake off my Duncan-induced lust haze.

  This definitely doesn’t bode well for me and my ability to resist him in the future.

  I have no idea what he has planned for us; all I know is that it’s a surprise and to wear comfortable shoes and clothes. But I have to admit; I can’t wait to see what he is up to. It’s been a while since I’ve been on an actual date.

  After taking care of business, my first stop is the coffee machine, like every morning. I check my Facebook while I wait for the coffee to brew. Ever since I left Europe, I haven’t been on social media, mostly because I couldn’t deal with the drama I left behind following me into my new life. Opening up the app, I scroll through my News Feed, not really reading anything people post. I do wonder why I have some of them on my friend’s list though, considering we haven’t talked in years. Suddenly, a notification pops up on my screen, letting me know someone sent me a message and wants to connect with me on messenger. Since we’ve already established I’m too curious for my own good, it’s no surprise I click to see who it is.

  The profile has no picture, and the name sounds like something straight out of Game of Thrones, definitely not someone I know, or so I thought. Normally, I would have ignored the message after not recognizing the person. Unfortunately, I glance at the text and see two words that freeze my blood and shatter the safety I thought I found here.

  Hi love…

  Love. Something only one person calls me. I haven’t been called this in four months. I can’t believe I was naïve enough to think leaving the country, hell, the continent, would be enough to make him go away. Shakily, I grab hold of the counter before I lower myself to the ground, too shaken up to keep standing. I’m vaguely aware that my breath is coming in pants, making me lightheaded, but I can’t concentrate on anything but the words on the screen.